From Azakiri to Kanimozeee, The notorious ‘Z’

So I was talking to my boss the other day and he had a question:
‘Which idiot decided to use the letter Z while writing Tamil names in English?’
‘Its to denote the letter  ழ which is unique to the Tamil language’ I replied proudly, curling my tongue as required before uttering the sound of ‘la’ just as my grand mom had taught me the art of pronouncing the  letter ’zha- ழ‘.
But why not just use the letter ‘L‘ rather than ‘Z‘? he reasoned ‘Its much closer to the original than Z‘ he shrugged.
The man had a point.

The Z has been a misfit even in the English language. Except for Zebra, Zip or Zuckerberg, its usage is limited to algebraic formulas in math class.No wonder it was relegated to the last spot in the list of alphabets! So when Z was substituted to take the place of the letter ழ while translation, it was destined to beat the shit out of the Tamil language. Take the examples of Kanimozhi, Azhagiri and Perarivazhan. These three names have been made famous in the national media over the past year for the wrong reasons. Most Tamils should be able to pronounce ழ correctly (though I feel the capabilities of new age Tamils and Chennai’ites in pronouncing ழ is declining drastically!) But the moment you hear a non-Tamil utter these words, all hell breaks loose!
Our news channels today provide the best example of the confusion created by the letter Z in place of ழ. This is what you might hear from a non Tamil:

Today, the supreme court has asked Mrs. Kanimozzeee to appear before it on the 3rd of June. The Union minister Mr Azzaagiri has blamed the congress for all the problems of corruption. Mr. Azaagiri is also expected to meet Mrs. Kanimodi along with Mr. Pazzaa-ni-man-cum and convey their support to her on behalf of the Dravid Munnera Kazzzaaacum.

Naturally, we Tamils aren’t pleased to hear our language being butchered in such fashion on live TV. But I refuse to entirely blame the others for the sorry state of Tamil or any other language when it is in the mercy of a translation medium. I simply feel that by replacing ‘Z‘ with ‘L‘, the Tamil language will suffer much less at the hands of those who want to use it by force and not by will.

Kanimoli, Alagiri and Perarivalan are much more recognizable and user friendly compared to the dreaded Z!

I, just like many other Tamils love to use the ழ wherever necessary. But it would be stupid to expect non Tamils also to pronounce it in the same fashion. I certainly don’t make any attempt to pronounce words properly in Hindi. I think the Z has only helped in scaring away non Tamils from this magical language. Protecting the purity and sanctity of a language is important but to expect another language to also justify and preserve that sanctity is simply naive.

Every language has its own unique characteristics and the above example of translatory abuse will hold true for many such predicaments across languages of the world. Unless we find easier ways of representing our mother tongues to the outside world, they will never want to learn it or respect it. So I kindly submit to the Tamil world to drop the stupid Z. Its the best way to respect the beautiful ழ

Peace.

(P.S- Thanks Abhijit for the brainwave!)

Lessons from the Grand Anaicut of Tamil Nadu

The story of the Kallanai imparts some very important lessons for us all. Find out here:

Lessons from the Kallanai

Regards,
The V

The 2013 Budget- Guna’s Opinion

The budget has just been presented. The reactions have been so far mixed (In a country of 1.2 billion, can there ever be any other reaction other than mixed?). Anyway, while the brilliant men and women of this country who are fortunate enough to air their views on TV continue to analyze this Budget, I thought it is important to go as lower in the society as possible to find out what they thought about this Budget. And who can get lower than Guna, our very own Auto driver from Chennai. As a ‘ration shop rice‘ survivor for two decades, Guna epitomizes the phrase ‘Born to comment on a Budget from a poor man’s point of view who is also a drunkard of an auto driver from Chennai who also likes to party and support the LTTE’. So lets hear it from the great man himself. Guna and his views on the Budget:

Guna’s Opinion

Me: Hi Guna
Guna: Burrp…
Me: So what do you think of the Budget?
Guna: Is Alcohol cheaper?
Me: No
Guna: Petrol?
Me: No
Guna: Women?
Me: Excuse me?
Guna: Anything for Thaikulam (women) in the budget?
Me: Yeah, a little bit.
Guna: Good. How about the rich Bastards?
Me: They need to pay more tax.
Guna: What about underwear?
Me: Underwear? What about it?
Guna: You told me you will buy and come that red type of underwear that Arnold is wearing in the poster in kabali’s Gym?
Me: Er yes, I shall get you your underwear soon. Can we please continue?
Guna: What about Current?
Me: Nothing in the budget about it.
Guna: Punitha Peeye! (Holy Shit). How much longer I have to sleep naked, I don’t know. Too much sweating without currendu ba!
Me: Umm.. So what do you think?
Guna: Well, thaikulam is happy means I am also happy.
Me: So you think it is a good budget?
Guna: Ya Ya. Tell Chidambaram Saar to change his Specks Ba. Nalla Illa! (Lights a cigarette)
Me: Oh Guna, cigarettes have become costlier by the way.
Guna: What? Ot#@, OMM@l@… Worsht Budget ma this! Thu! Chi! Get me cigarette, cancel the underwear ba! (Putting out the cigarette and tucking it away for later.)

Solving India’s Problems- Langur Style!

I love the way we Indians solve our problems. Be it the simple piece of folded paper below a rocking chair or the introduction of FDI in retail to boost our economy, Indians love myopic and temporary solutions that only serves in complicating the original problem.

Picture courtesy National Geographic

A classic example of the manner in which we solve problems in this country is the case of the famed Langur monkeys of Delhi. The Delhi municipal corporation employs Langur’s to get rid of the common Rhesus monkey’s that infest the Capital city. Rhesus monkeys, which aren’t scared of humans are gripped by fear upon laying their eyes on a Langur. Whenever a complaint is lodged by someone about the monkeys creating nuisance in a locality, the Langur and its caretaker go to the problem spot. As soon as the monkeys lay eyes on the Langur, they disperse from that area, shrieking with terror. Mission Accomplished! The Langur and its caretaker happily collect their fees and retire for the day.

But wait, where do the monkeys actually go? That is a question nobody wants to ask or answer in India. The truth is, the monkeys just shift from one location to another. In a couple of days, the same Langur or a different one is called upon to act on these very same monkeys who are wreaking havoc in a new locality where they recently shifted. So the current solution for this problem is that the monkeys will be chased around from one area to another. The system only tries to distribute the burden of the nuisance equally among its citizens without really finding a permanent solution!

India has a lot of monkeys- Casteism  poverty, illiteracy, terrorism to name a few. All these monkeys are only made to jump from pillar to post, hidden away from society behind the screen of Apathy and ignorance. Neither has there been a concrete plan nor any united action since Independence to weed out these nuisances. Instead, we Indians carry on with our lives, selfishly trying to ensure that the monkeys don’t land on our doorstep.

But the monkeys will come one day. And we will then run around looking for the inefficient Langur’s that we have created in the form of our systems and services, all the while cursing the government and society for its failure to provide a permanent solution to our problems. But before we go around blasting everybody else for our problems, spare a thought to all the monkeys we have created which now roams on someones lawn- The bike you park in front of a gate, the plastic bag you throw out from your car, the mobile phone you answer while driving, the money you bribe a policeman with… the list of self created monkeys goes on and on… Its time we stopped creating more monkeys and actively took part in finding permanent solutions to those existing ones. India is far too great a country to be held back because of its Langur Style!!

How to Win an Oscar- A 10 point formula

Guna

So ‘Argo‘ wins the best movie award at the Oscar’s this year. Frankly, I thought it would be Lincoln. But then there was Zero Dark Thirty which certainly seemed like a strong contender until a few weeks back. The increasingly tough competition at the Oscar’s points to only one thing- More and more movie makers have learnt the art of making an Oscar winning movie. It doesn’t matter if the movie is good or bad, what matters is if it satisfies a few ground rules laid down by the academy. Let me present to you a 10 point formula that one needs to keep in mind if he or she wants to win an Oscar:

1. The Jew Factor-Make movies about Jews. They can be a pianist, a terrorist or a barber for all you care- The role doesn’t matter. As long as your protagonist is a Jew, you are in with a good chance to walk home with an Oscar
2. War on Terror- Gone are the days when the Rambo’s and the James Bond flicks tried to cash in on the cold war. If you want an Oscar  pack your bags and go shoot a terrorist flick in Jordan. The plot does not matter- All you need are a couple of suicide bombers and a group of triumphant American Marines. Throw in a few choppers and Bombs, you got yourself a winner.
3. World War II- Saving Private Ryan is a classic example of why the great war is still an Oscar Magnet even after so many years.But what makes the combination even more deadly is again, a Jewish story during World War II. That is a 100% Oscar award winner.
4. Avoid Historical American Wounds- America is the land of freedom.You can make any movie you want and criticize anyone but if you are serious about winning an Oscar  please refrain from rubbing wounds on American History- As the Zero Dark Thirty and Avatar teams have now realized, you cant show the Americans torturing their prisoners or Destroying the natives land and still expect to win an Oscar for it!
5. The Miserables- Any movie on Africa, Asia, Poverty, AIDS, rebels, genocide etc are given at least 1 Oscar.
6. Biography- A biographical movie has a strong chance of winning an Oscar. It doesn’t matter if the person who the movie is based on is alive or dead, rich or poor, good or bad, boring or interesting.
7. Family- Any movie that revolves around a Dysfunctional American Family is certain to knock down at least a few awards.
8. Sci-Fi Alien Movies- If your storyline revolves around an american hero saving the entire world from anihilation because of an attack by aliens/mutated beasts/ comic book villians, then  Congratulations- You just won an Oscar.
9. Mental Disorder- One interesting way of winning an Oscar would be to make the protagonist in your movie to suffer from some form of mental disorder. The academy loves schizophrenia, psychosis, dementia etc.
10. Meryl Streep- If nothing else works, even if you plan to make a movie as bad as Mars Attacks, make sure you rope in Meryl Streep. She is the surest and easiest way to get your hands on an Oscar!

Design can change Behavior?!

The next time you hit the brakes hard upon seeing a speed breaker on the road, please spare a thought for the reason behind that ugly bump in the middle of an otherwise smooth road. The world of design has developed many such products and systems that lead to behavioral change in Humans. But in the backdrop of an alarming increase in crimes against women and other social evils, one wonders: How important a role does Design have to play in raising awareness and changing peoples mindsets. Find out:

Behavioural Change through Design

Reagards,

The V

An Ode to Design

What kind of a Design story can a mere Toothpick tell you? Find out:

An Ode to Design

Regards,
The V